09/07/20

Notes on Imposter Syndrome

Hey you!

Thanks for stopping by. We are a week into the new month and I want to have a quick chat about something I’ve been struggling with for years. With the pandemic becoming everyones new “normal”and my maternity leave seeming to fly by, I’ve decided to really make time for the things that feed my soul. Creating content has always been something that I enjoy, mainly because I LOVE storytelling. This blog and my socials allow me to share stories across multiple platforms using many mediums. The only problem? A lack of consistency.

It doesn’t matter that I’ve had my Youtube channel for 10+ years or that I’ve been blogging for 7. My lack of consistency makes it seem as though I’m not really doing this at all. And if I’m honest with myself, the lack of consistency is due to a myriad of things but at the top of that list is Imposter Syndrome. No matter how many years I’ve been doing this, I’ve never felt that I was talented enough to be in this space. Wild, right? compound all of this with the fact that I’m a new mama and all hopes of being consistent at anything that doesn’t involve my human goes out the window.

For someone who writes a lot of poetry centered around stepping into your light and reminding yourself that the sun never need permission or time, to shine, it’s crazy that I’m unable to register the message in my own work. So many people have thanked me for my words and have told me how my poems have helped them go for their dreams and here I am falling victim to Imposter Syndrome. I pay $200+ every year to host a blog that sees no financial return and no steady growth in audience or engagement. At some point I had to take a long look at myself and make a decision about either letting this space go, or doing the work necessary to keep the fires beneath my passions lit. However, doing all of this is counterproductive if there is no measurable growth.

Now more than ever I feel more ready to put my all into this because of one thing. One tiny little human, actually. I never want my son to grow up seeing that I gave up on any of my dreams. I want him to see what commitment and consistency yields. I want him to see how much love and value his mama sees in herself.

Here’s how I plan on doing better:

Create A Schedule

Batch Shoots & Writing

Monthly Audits

The truth is, creating content takes a lot of work behind the scenes. What I lacked before was understanding that I needed to treat this like a job with a set schedule for it to “work”. I get it now. I won’t allow this Imposter Syndrome to allow me to feel as though I’m not allowed to take up space or that my view on life holds no value. Have y’all seen the milk aisle in a grocery store? If I can find 52 different types of one thing within a 6 feet radius, then I can add my voice to the content creator world. i hope you guys will hold me accountable and I promise we’ll have some fun and learn from each other as we go.

If you’re like me and you’re struggling with consistency, try to remember your “why”. The truth is, we’re human and we can sometimes be extremely lazy once complacency sets in. The key is to really get tunnel-visioned about why you’re doing what you’re doing to begin with. Write the book, start the cooking channel, practice your skill everyday so that the imposter in your head has no choice but to take a back seat and watch you work!

Remember, Now has always been the best time….

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